Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died. - Erma Bombeck
Will and Guy's Best Selection Medical Quotes
The download manager is part of our virus and malware filtering system and certifies the file's reliability. The download will be executed through a download manager. The mentioned download manager doesn't have any relationship with the author.Microsoft.NET Framework could also be available for download on the author's.Jaleco aims to offer downloads free of virusesand malware. Como baixar net framework 3.5.
Sponsored Links ∇Funny Medical Quotes
It is amazing what the medical profession will write. These are actual statements taken from medical interview records written by various paramedics, emergency room receptionists, and (we are afraid) a consultant or two at major hospitals.
Funny Medical Advice
Keep Taking the Medicine
Patient: It's been one month since my last visit and I still feel miserable.
Doctor: Did you follow the instructions on the medicine I gave you?
Patient: I sure did - the bottle said 'keep tightly closed.'
Quick Diagnosis
Nurse: 'Doctor, Doctor the man you've just treated collapsed on the front step. What should I do?'
Doctor: 'Turn him around so it looks like he was just arriving!'
Eating Disorder
A mother complained to her doctor about her daughter's strange eating habits. 'All day long she lies in bed and eats yeast and car wax. What will happen to her?'
'Eventually,' said the Doctor, 'she will rise and shine.'
Timing
My doctor gave me two weeks to live. I hope they're in August. Ronnie Shakes
Who Can You Trust?
If you trust Google more than your doctor than maybe it's time to switch doctors. Jadelr and Cristina Cordova The Specialist
'What kind of work do you do?' a woman passenger enquired of the man travelling in her train compartment.
'I'm a Naval surgeon,' he replies.
'My word!' spluttered the woman, 'How you doctors specialise these days.'
A panel of doctors was asked for their opinions concerning a proposal to build a new wing to their hospital. This was what they said:
One has a greater sense of intellectual degradation after an interview with a doctor than from any human experience. Alice James
An Alternative Medical Dictionary: Kindly Submitted by Nigel Morris
Taxi to the Hospital
A woman flagged down a cab.
'Where to?' the cabbie asked.
'The hospital,' the woman answered.
'Where at the hospital?' the cabbie asked.
'Maternity ward.' the woman answered.
A determined look crossed the cabbie's face. 'Okay, I'll get you there. Don't you worry!' He then floored it and started weaving past cars.
'No no, you don't need to drive so fast,' the woman said. 'I only work there!'
Footnote:
See more funny doctor jokes Beware If Your Doctor Uses These Medical Phrases
Health Check
The great secret of doctors, known only to their wives, but still hidden from the public, is that most things get better by themselves; most things, in fact, are better in the morning.
Doctors and Quacks
In Britain today, there are about 50,000 practitioners of alternative medicine, but only about 30,000 qualified doctors. The Five Best, Clean and Hilarious Conversations Overheard in Hospital
Funny Medical Quotes From The Medical Council of Canada Entry Exam
Footnote:
Please send us your funny medical quotes. See more clean funny doctor jokes and medical stories:
♥ Funny doctor jokes ♥ Doctor humour and advice ♥ Funny medical quotes ♥Doctor Cartoon
♥ Medical jokes ♥ Funny medical terms ♥ Hospital stories ♥ Funny hospital pictures ♥ Will's Dr
♥ Good dentist jokes ♥ Dentist horror stories ♥Podiatrist jokes ♥Mental health jokes ♥Video
Some of us keep absolutely nothing in our car trunks, while others have enough packed to live in their cars for weeks. Somewhere in between is this list of thirty things we think every car owner should always have on hand.
Show Us Your Trunk
Winter is coming, so now might be a good time to think about what you carry around in your…
Read more Read
Advertisement
You can buy packaged emergency safety kits, like this one from AAA, which includes a booster cable, flashlight, first aid kit, and many other items, but the DIY approach is more satisfying and you probably already have many of these items lying around. It’s not just about emergencies or safety, either. Below I’ve separated the checklists by category.
$32
GMG may get a commission
Advertisement
Car Repair and Maintenance
Advertisement
There’s nothing like breaking down at the side of the road and realizing the spare tire in your trunk has a flat from the last time it happened. (True story.) To keep you up and running, keep these in your trunk:
Advertisement
Fix-A-Flat S60420 Tire Inflator with Eco-Friendly Formula, (16…
GMG may get a commission
Advertisement
$19
GMG may get a commission
$80
[Ultra Compact] Anker Compact Car Jump Starter and Portable…
GMG may get a commission
Advertisement
Advertisement
$11
GMG may get a commission
Duck Brand 394468 All-Purpose Duct Tape, 1.88 Inches by 45…
GMG may get a commission
Advertisement
$10
GMG may get a commission
Advertisement
And You Will Know Us by the Trail of Parts: Check Tire Pressure
The reason to check your tire pressure is usually explained with some nearly unbelievable…
Read more Read
Ten Heroic Duct Tape Car Repairs
Who says the dog is man's best friend? When it comes to getting stuff done on your car, a roll …
Read more Read
Advertisement
Safety and Survival
Advertisement
You might already have an emergency go bag or kit set up. If you spend a lot of time in your car and it’s always nearby when you’re home, you could just keep that kit in your trunk—or create a second, perhaps lighter version.
In any case, your safety supplies should include:
Five Best Multitools
If you carry around a multitool in your bag or pocket for quick fixes, repair work, or just in case …
Funny Thiings To Call A Emergency Kit For Iphone
Advertisement
DIY Altoid-Tin Solar Radio for $3
If you're a beginning electronic hobbyist looking for an inexpensive project or just want to…
Read more Read
A few car-specific items:
For winter/snow emergencies:
Put Together a Winter Car Emergency Kit
Earlier this week we talked about an emergency kit for your home, now it's time to focus on…
Read more
Funny Thiings To Call A Emergency Kit VideoRead
Advertisement
Convenience and Comfort
Advertisement
In addition to the basics above, you might want to keep these things around also:
Jul 24, 2016 As you are facing issues with system crashes error: Microsoft Windows - The application is not responding, do not worry we will help you with this issue. Do let us know following to assist you better with this issue: Have you made any changes to the operating system that might have resulted in this? What is the make and model of the system? English Community Lenovo Notebooks Lenovo P, Y and Z series Notebooks 'Microsoft Windows The application is not responding. The program may respond again if you wait. Jan 07, 2014 Microsoft Windows (The application is not responding.) Hello all, Since a couple of days ago, whenever I turn on my laptop normally, it loads until the 'Welcome' screen is reached. It then becomes unbearably slow. After waiting and logging in, the desktop is partially displayed with a white, translucent overlay and is completely unresponsive. Mar 18, 2018 Screen went to grey, you could still see desktop folders/wallpaper, then the message Microsoft Windows, the application is not responding. The program may respond again if you wait. Nothing I can do so I power off PC using the power button. Mar 11, 2016 Microsoft Windows. The application is not responding. The program may respond again if you wait. If I click End Process, it ends Windows? And the screen goes to the desktop background (with the exception of any program icons). A Ctrl+Alt+Delete does nothing here. Yet, the system is still responsive because I can move my mouse.
GMG may get a commission
Advertisement
This isn’t an exhaustive list, and your needs might vary. While it might sound like a lot, all this stuff doesn’t take up too much space. Jalopnik’s Opposite Lock Kinja blog shows us your car might have good hiding places to stash all of your just-in-case items.
Funny Things To Call A Emergency KittensJunk in the trunk
It's always good to have some basic tools in your car and maybe some other odds and ends. It…
Read more Read
Advertisement
Photos by Scott & Elaine van der Chijs, State Farm, and bradleygee.
Comments are closed.
|
AuthorWrite something about yourself. No need to be fancy, just an overview. ArchivesCategories |